Today, many people with cancer are treated as outpatients, which means they do not have to stay in the hospital. During this time, it is normal for these people to need help, support and encouragement.
Many studies have found that cancer survivors who have strong emotional support tend to adjust better to the changes cancer brings, have a more positive outlook and an improved quality of life. Research has shown that people with cancer need the constant support of family and friends.
You can make a big difference in the life of a cancer patient.
The big question is: HOW?
As you spend time with this person and learn more about how cancer is affecting his or her daily life, see what different activities look like and how in the midst of them you can accompany your loved one as a presence, love and willingness to help. Sometimes, the activities you want to do may be different from what your loved one can or wants to do, due to fatigue, mood or symptoms that may arise, so understand that each day is unique.
Here are some tips and advice to help you keep your beloved friend or family member company.
Write notes and call them.
- Make sure your friend knows how important he or she is to you. Show them that your affection is always present.
- Send frequent, brief notes or messages, or call them regularly.
- Ask how he or she is doing, how he or she is feeling.
- End a call or note with “I’ll be in touch soon” and stick to it.
- Respond to their messages as soon as possible.
- Remember that every day is different, many days you won’t even feel like responding – just send a message of love and support and remember that it’s always welcome!
- He will have easier days than others, those away from treatments or when the symptoms have passed a bit. So, enjoy those days together and let him feel your presence.
Go visit him
Cancer can be very isolating. Try to spend time with this person: you can be a distraction and it will also help him to feel accompanied, distracted and motivated, leaving in the background the complex situation he is going through.
- Always let him know before visiting him. You must know if he wants to see you at this time.
- Schedule a visit that allows you to provide physical and emotional support to the caregiver as well. You may be able to stay with your friend while the caregiver leaves the house for a couple of hours.
- Make short, regular visits instead of long, infrequent ones. Understand that your friend may not want to talk, but he or she doesn’t like to be alone either. A good silence is better than a lot of words.
- Begin and end the visit with a loving moment – hugs are always welcome!
- Always make reference to your next visit so they look forward to it.
- Share music they love, watch their favorite TV show or enjoy a movie.
- Offer to take a short walk with him.
- Make your visit a positive one, with encouraging and motivational phrases. Avoid becoming a person who generates more worries.
Have a conversation
Many people worry about not knowing what to say to someone with cancer. Try to remember that the most important thing is not what you say, but that you are there and willing to listen. Try to listen and understand how this person is feeling. Let him or her know that you are open to talking when he or she wants to. Or, if the person doesn’t feel like talking, let him or her know that’s okay too.
- Listen without always feeling like you have to respond. Sometimes what the person needs most is to be heard.
- Help him or her focus on what makes him or her feel good.
- Help your friend maintain an active role in the friendship by asking for advice, opinions and questions, even if you don’t get the response you expect. Tell him or her about yourself; it’s important to know that the friendship continues to be active on both sides.
- Ask your friend if he or she has any discomfort.
- Support your loved one feelings.
- Don’t tell him how strong he is; he may feel the need to act strong even when he is sad or exhausted. It is permissible for him to express all emotions, but always remind him that he can feel better tomorrow.
Giving a useful gift will always be a very good option to accompany this person. Look for small, practical things that he or she will enjoy. Think about what their day to day life is like and what could improve it. Sometimes, we don’t know what to give, whether to send something to eat, but what will they be able to eat? What we want most is to give him a gift that touches his heart, that strengthens and accompanies him in his daily life. A gift that will help him transform his days, and that will remind him that you are always by his side. Remember that in Healing Presents we have The Gift of Giving, an option of accompaniment to strengthen, promote balance and well-being on a physical and emotional level, and what better gift than to share this with your loved one. And remember, it is scientifically proven that through the practice of meditation and mindfulness, you can improve the quality of life and well-being of cancer patients.
That is why, with a spiritual approach to life and human existence, these meditations are created for each phase of this path (accompaniment from diagnosis, surgery, chemotherapy, radiotherapy, other treatments, daily healing) optimizing these moments through mindfulness, creating greater resilience, strength, positivity, calm and compassion.
In addition, you will help him to be able to schedule his appointments, procedures and treatments in one same place. When scheduling surgery and treatments, he will receive a reminder and a specific meditation to prepare for the upcoming moment. These will help him to enter to his appointments or procedures more calmly, and focus on the present moment.
As someone who received it recently said “This gift, it touched my heart”.
May your gift touch your loved one’s heart and accompany them through the daily challenges they face.
What better gift than to give them full access to all the experiences of the App for as long as you wish!
- Contact us at support@healingpresents.co or through our Instagram @healingpresents
- Create your personalized code: Example Joewearewithyou
- Define the plan and the duration: 1-3-6 months
- We will share with your loved one this special gift of life, which is access to the app you are giving them!
We are with you. Light and strength for you.